A super candid mini action list for Election Week health
In lieu of this week's Monday Matter roundup...
Hey Foreign Bodies, I just wanted to take a moment to remind everyone to try and take extra care of themselves this week. It might feel more like Hell than the other hellish weeks we’ve survived this year, and it’s OK if you’re having a harder time getting enough rest—or a harder time doing anything *but* sleeping. I’m going to share a handful of actions I want to take to prioritize my well-being even more than usual this week in hopes that it helps someone out. Please share your own tips in the comments, if you can!
My very candid and incomplete mini to-do list for Election Week health:
Don’t feel bad for failing to do any of these “action” items. Just try to let Faiz and my friends (and any other loved ones) know they might need to check up on me more often.
Set up automatic email replies to let folks know I may be delayed in responding but will get back to them by Monday 11/9. If it’s an emergency, they’re welcome to nudge me with a second email, but I think doing this will take some guilt and stress off of me.
Do I need to ask for a deadline extension for next week’s story? Think about it and reach out to the editor now. Early notice is good.
STOCK UP ON CANDY (current obsession: Kinder Bueno bars)
Start each morning off with fresh air, even if it’s just having hot tea with the freezing wind in my face. Or just press my nose against the window.
For the love of the universe, don’t forget the antidepressants.
Before sitting down at the desk (or working from bed), clean up a little and light a candle. Make my bed and the dogs’ bed.
Check on plants every day even though they’re probably fine since I literally just watered and fertilized them over the weekend. The ritual is peaceful!
Is it weird to make plans to…laugh?
Apparently, it’s good to pre-schedule WORRYING time. Like, 10-20 minutes of pure worrying. That’s according to Dr. Jenny Taitz, who recently offered tips for Tim Herrera’s weekend panel on mental health. Shouts to Kaitlyn Arford for the live tweets! Should I schedule worrying time?? Idk if it’ll help me, but I guess I could try.
Note to self: Please don’t compare yourself to anyone else, especially now!! Some won’t feel as intensely as me, some might be thriving despite the chaos, some might be publishing more than I’ve published in a while. Some might be using this moment as a creativity boost. “Envy is an emotion that points us in the direction of our desire,” Dr. Juli Fraga said in Tim’s panel. Try to use that feeling as a sign to work toward an exciting new goal, maybe?!
Try to work (and play!) outdoors especially on TUESDAY, preferably near one of the quieter benches in the park. Invite my friend to join me until it’s dark out. Bring bagels and hot chocolate. Repeat often.
Paint and draw a lot. Maybe redesign a website. Some kind of creative hobby that has nothing to do with work.
Don’t miss therapy appointments (physical and mental).
CRY
Also, masturbate.
Set phone reminders for every few hours to check in on my daily nourishment—have I had enough water? Have I eaten yet? Showered? Also look out for Karen Ho’s doom-scrolling reminders on Twitter.
Take a note from my friend Jewel, who’s been meal-prepping for the first time in anticipation of this week. Or at least keep some instant ramen in the pantry.
Avoid social media if I notice restlessness and other symptoms of anxiety creep up. Boundaries are healthy. But also, I don’t know how to avoid Twitter during all this. Maybe ask a friend to text me and remind me to get off? Or set a phone reminder? AHHHH
Look out for signs of a panic attack and ask my brother to just check in every now and then if he can since he’ll be home. (Smile because Faiz is home and I couldn’t get through this election season without him!)
Turn all news notifications off. Seek news only when I feel ready.
Let friends know if I don’t feel like receiving election-related calls/texts!!! News doesn’t affect us all the same and I tend to internalize it all to a strange degree. Also, keep phone on Do Not Disturb while home and safe.
SEND LOTS OF MEMES AND FUNNY VIDEOS TO FRIENDS AND THEY WILL PROBABLY RECIPROCATE
Speaking of friends, give someone I love and trust a call if I feel like talking it out—or even pre-schedule a post-Tuesday chat. A great tip from a great friend. (Hi, Puja!)
Get the candles together. I think there’s some in storage. Don’t burn it all down.
Plan to splurge on at least two feel-good meals. Old Fourth Ward pizza for Election Day and…maybe some Italian or sushi on Friday? We’ll see.
Plan to spend time cooking meals I love. Maybe even a favorite dessert? I suck at baking, but it’ll definitely be a solid distraction... (Thanks for the tip, Steph!)
Cook early on during the day, because mom and dad tend to watch CNN in the basement den (where I cook) in the evenings and televised election news really, really stresses me out. [Avoid televised election news if I can help it]
Be mindful of alcohol consumption this week. Stick to wine.
If it’s dark (and it’ll get dark early) use that as an excuse to start winding down. Doom-scrolling in bed is better than doom-scrolling on the couch, amirite?? (No)
If I get up in the middle of the night and can’t go back to sleep: Try Headspace’s SOS sleep meditation (FREE Election Anxiety Headspace meditations available through 11/26), read a few pages from Jenny Offil’s Dept. of Speculation or just get up and move around a little. It’s fine if nothing seems to work. Drink coffee, get a head start on an assignment and try to squeeze in a nap during the day. Try…hard…to avoid reading the news in the middle of the night.
Move ya body, girl. Even if it’s just for a few minutes.
Check out these breathing exercises my best friend Sehar swears by. She’s a behavioral therapist and says it’s not only helpful for her young clients with autism when they get especially anxious, but helpful for her, too!
TikTok is kind of relaxing. Maybe spend some extra time on TikTok. Plant TikTok, artsy TikTok, home decor TikTok, animal TikTok. Also, need to charge Nintendo Switch for Animal Crossing.
Go on looooooong walks with Lady, but try to avoid the Trump signs in the neighborhood if I don’t feel comfortable. Maybe play fetch in the backyard instead to get her exercise in?
Wash face and use toner + moisturizer before bed.
Forgive myself for not washing my face before bed last night.
Try a bubble bath. My friend Najja loves a good bubble bath. My friend Najja is smart.
Write some poetry or prose, especially if it’s harder to get full sentences out. Maybe doodle instead if words don’t make sense.
Make note of all the weird ways my body might be reacting to how I’m feeling so I can bring it up in therapy or to just be mindful of for the future. So far: spine-related chronic pain, headaches, biting of inner cheek/lip, toothaches etc.
A smart reminder from Nylah Burton for anyone like me who is chronically suicidal: Come up with a safety plan for friends and family. In her plan (read here), Nylah includes her family’s/friends’ contact info with explicit instructions about people she doesn’t want involved in the process; medications; DOB; diagnoses and symptoms; non-law enforcement emergency mental health response teams; nearby hospital info; apartment admin number and more.
Indulge in more escapist art—TV, books. My personal TV recs: Steven Universe, Schitt’s Creek, The Great British Bake Off, Living Single, The Good Place, What We Do in the Shadows, Bob’s Burgers, Portlandia, Parks and Rec, The Golden Girls… (Also, trash TV is perfect) and some escapist lit: Daisy Jones & The Six by Taylor Jenkins Reid, Mexican Gothic by Silvia Moreno-Garcia (enter giveaway!!), Circe by Madeline Miller, I Feel Bad About My Neck And Other Thoughts on Being a Woman by Nora Ephron, A Burning by Megha Majumdar, Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris, Call Me By Your Name by André Aciman, Fleishman Is In Trouble by Taffy Brodesser-Akner etc.
Cry a little more.
“Allow yourself morning.” - Bassey Ikpi
Sending you all love, always.
—Fiza
stealing your email response tip!